December 14th

Today at work we learned that the 5 of us out of the whole site who are Navarro Employee's will not get bonuses, not because we did anything wrong, because we failed to be employed by the "right" company. Not that we were given a choice therefore we are punished.

This is how I feel, and that is that!

What's worse is that I have put off other parts of my life to be at work. Here lately I have been taking off for one doc's appointment or two. But to be honest, it's December and THEY rescheduled my dates and messed up a week or two of my work life!

Our Department has gotten a merit and been recognised for a number of things, but I guess the 5 of us haven't! 2 of the 11 of us haven't even been there for 1 month yet (those two will get bonuses by the way cause they work for a different company)!

My family has had it hard enough, I have poured myself in to my job, I have been home late, came in early, tried to be on time at least 90% of the time. Trained 4 people in the span of a year to take over my job, while trying to keep my work in my new job caught up, taken on more responsibility and never asked more than once for someone to show me something. I catch on fast. And some of my other co-workers deserve a Bonus as well as they have went through similar situations, such as taking on more responsibility, training people, and even one stays late, comes in early, people call her at home, she barely gets a day off and for what not to even be recognised when bonuses are handed out.

This is not about my injustice, it is about OUR injustice. If the whole project gets rewarded with a BONUS check but the five of us we will be horribly pissed off! We are thankful for having a job, but were just as content with our jobs with Energx before all of this came along and screwed it all up. Our health was great, bonus every year, you could cash in your PTO and use it at christmas if you were short money.

But with the company I am with now you loose anything over 80 hours at the end of the year in PTO, there is no cashing it in, if you don't use it you lose it. The other companies out at my site allow cashing in, they allow you to keep as much as you want anything over 200 hours they cash in for you and give it to you in a check.

The other company's have given bonuses this year, or have sat dates in order to disperse them. So this has been my day pissing and moaning over a bonus.

When I should be enjoying my life, I swear some this crap is taking moments off my life I can feel it, and people wonder why I have grey hair. 

I am soo tired right now, some times I wish I could quit but buddy and I are barely making it these days I wouldn't mind being a stay at home mom,  I have plenty I would do if I did stay at home! My child would benifit more as she gets no education! My mother sends her home with rats nest hair and it seems that no one cares but me what she looks like. 

I pray all the time that buddy will get a better job and things will look up for us, but honestly good things do not happen to good people. I try hard to back up my friends and others who are RIGHT, and I try to do what is right! I don't just look out for number one! I have agreed with people I didn't get along with just because it was right, no matter how wrong they were to me, no matter how much dislike I had for them. 

It is just the RIGHT thing! I can't stand people who can't desifer what is right from what is just immoral. 

Maybe I am the only one with this problem. Yes it is a problem cause I find myself struggling all the time while those who would have spit or stepped on me to get to where they needed to be do just fine. This goes the same with buddy to. 

I find myself thinking I am bad luck and all that comes from me is bad! But I know I have done a lot of good, and it is not to make up for evil in my past cause there simply is none!

I never dabled in drugs or theft! I never hurt people or tore there things up just cause I didn't have any. I never did anything that was just WRONG! 

I tried real hard to gain approval from numerous people and never got it, not even my own mother! All I wanted was just to do what was right and be who I was.

You don't find that much, it is rare I meet others who are the same way without motive or some kind of WANT behind their RIGHT. 

So anyways on to something else! 

Maybe things will change but if they don't I will be keeping my eyes opened for another job somewhere else, I am not quiting my job, but I will keep my eyes opened for something better.

My friend Anna and I got togeather tonight, she missed my birthday over the weekend and she brought me a present and a card. I will put the card on my desk at work to remind myself that one person recognises what over 500 don't! 

But the coolest part is she got me a snuggie. She remembered I once said that Snuggies are the kind of thing that you don't buy yourself cause it seems odd! So you get it as a gift and it is ok!

So I got my zebra striped snuggie on while typing this post. I am awesome I got my snuggie on and I have managed to get over the loss of a bonus I feel I deserve!


Here is a pic of me enjoying my snuggie one of the many small joys in my life! I wonder if they will make the Breast Feeding snuggie for breast feeding moms? What it is a lagitimate question.

These were taken at the christmas Party over the weekend on friday. I was real stressed see the post for friday!