Being home.

It is nice being home, but it is all so overwhelming. On Tuesday they released me from the hospital late, we had to drive home in the rain and Cedar Bluff was flooded and people in Knox drive like some crazy idiots in the rain or snow. Both girls fell asleep on the way home. We had to take back roads cause the interstate was SO backed up in both directions.


We got home.. and instead of calling in my scripts for me, or just filling them at the hospital, I had to run out and take paper scripts to wal-mart, and have them filled myself not something you want to do after just having a baby. I then went to BK and got us all dinner and that was confusing because they put in a second speaker box at the BK! WOW I can imagine how confusing that would be.


So Emma did good while I was away at the store and I didn't get any calls from buddy saying he didn't know what to do cause there was nothing to do. Something that I can assure you was not the case with Kailey!


To add to my horrible anxiety I have a bit of depression. Most people know I am not one to cry. I just don't do it, I didn't even cry when my best friend died, so I am sure not gonna cry over stupid stuff... but I did and have done that and I must confess it is not my best side....now I remember why I don't cry.....ummm yeah its pathetic.


So with thanksgiving on Thursday I was a bit overwhelmed with baby feeding, cooking and trying to have to get over the fact my family was coming down. The sad part is that my mother was supposed to come down and help cook and I eventually had to call her and wake her up at like 4 or 5pm. My dad said, "you should have just called when you were ready for her to come" I just had a kid and she promised she would help I shouldn't have to call her.


when she finally got here I just went and took care of Emma and left what was left to do up to her. Kailey had helped me with a lot of the stuff earlier. she has been a big helper, she helped make green bean casserole, she helped make banana pudding, she even helped with sweet potato casserole and 3 pumpkin pies I made from scratch. She also injected the turkey with creole butter


We had a good pre-thanksgiving dinner cooking party Kailey and I did. Needless to say by the time my mom got here I had to cluster feed poor Emma who I hadn't had time to MAKE wake up and eat. Yes Emma you have to MAKE her wake up to eat. Most babies would cry and beg for food I have to cry and beg her to wake up and eat lol.


So here is the highlight of our thanksgiving evening. Before all the food was ready and before my dad got back my mother went down the hall to our communal bathroom and was using it with the door wide opened and the lights turned out. Buddy who has to drink to deal with her craziness and sometimes dad, went to go use the bathroom... and there was my 40-something year old mother (yes I am not sure of her age) sitting on the toilet. So he just turned and walked away reminding himself that it is just one holiday and gonna forget about it. She then calls for him "Buddy" as if she wasn't on the toilet and there was nothing wrong with it....he says "WHAT" she says "tell Amanda to get me a pad" (not embarrassed at all by the way).


I am in the other end of the house talking to Buddy's mom on the phone, while breast feeding my kid. Buddy comes in there and tells me what just happened so I give him his mother on the phone, walk to the other bathroom where my mother is still sitting waiting on me to hand deliver a pad which is right behind her on the shelving behind the toilet, which she shouldn't have expected me to have or supply to her anyways, she knows that for the last 5 years I haven't needed them... Oh and by the way this is the same woman who has told EVERY one that she has had a hysterectomy.


So I tell her the pads are behind you, shut the fucking door this isn't a private room, no one wants to see you on the toilet this ain't your house. She says, well Kailey left the door opened, umm all I could think is what ever when buddy walked in she didn't ask him to shut it, then she expected I believe that Kailey left it opened. Now she wonders why we don't do holidays with them! We normally just have an immediate family holiday, me buddy and Kailey but because of Emma we decided that we would let them come (cause they imposed) because I may need the help after all I just had a baby.


So after the fucked up bathroom incident, she told buddy, "i had to clean that turkey out with my bare hands it was like having sex (while shaking her hips)." umm what the hell is wrong with this woman. I am SO embarrassed of her I want to crawl under a rock. I hope that whatever stupid she is stuck on isn't passable to my children!


So I think she was sick she had made mention that if she drank too much caffeine she would get diarrhea, which I think she had been sick with for a few days, cause Emma started having Diarrhea the next morning and still has it. I am worried if she doesn't stop having it she will be at children's before the end of the weekend.


Oh my mom had to announce her diarrhea issue at dinner.


So I wanted to go out for black Friday but the new baby kind of enabled me to do so. I need to get out of the house though. I am so tired though I cant and it is not the babies fault cause she sleeps from 2am - 7 or 8 am with no waking. I love her, she is the best baby in the world. I am just wore out and in pain. I use to have a high pain tolerance now I feel like it is pretty damn low.


The only upside to my mother coming to my house for Thanksgiving is she is an obsessive compulsive cleaner and she cleaned my kitchen for me and put away all my food. so this was my holiday and I hope you have found the energy to pick yourself up off the floor and quit laughing to get off my page.

Emma is here

So on Saturday I wasn't feeling well and I finally promised Kailey I would take her to the playground and instead I took her to lunch. We had Chinese food and then we went to food city and got food for dinner as buddy said he was going to cook. So then I get home with the food he is not here yet and I decide to take Kailey and go to Misty's house and see if her and Donna want to go walking. I haven't been doing much but feeling really over full and sitting on the couch.


So then I came home and Buddy came home and we just hung out I made hamburger helper for dinner and we watched the UT game and then we watched USC vs Oregon. After the game was over I was half way dozing on the couch. I was almost asleep when I felt a huge pop in my stomach. I got up thinking it was just my imagination, then another pop and water was running all down my legs.


I told Buddy and he was like no shit? I was like Yes It broke and I went to change my clothes and call my mother who would come get Kailey and take her to her house and keep her until buddy could come back for her. It was about 11:34 when I called  my mother started packing some stuff to take to the hospital.


We got to Park west at midnight. It was now the 20th of November. The lady said, "you may have just peed on yourself so lets check." I started having contractions in the car they were not so bad... when she finally figured out that it was my water my contractions were 3 min apart she was just to stupid to know that because she was in the mindset that umm contractions take forever to speed up....


So by the time they were less than a minute apart and I was in agonizing pain and all the good that comes from labor she wasn't anywhere near my room. Thank the lord she was apparently stupid or something else was wrong with her.


So I finally get a half Epi and it takes effect almost Immediately leaving my body numb to pain but able to feel the pressure and it was a way better relief than what I was going through. I honestly thought contractions wouldn't be that bad but these things were awful. I don't know how anyone could think through a contraction? I give kudo's to women who actually get no help for their contractions and have contractions that are hard to manage with breathing mine got so bad I couldn't breath...


So I start pushing, I didn't push but maybe 10 or so times but during this time they let me know she has hair. Then she eventually crowns but she was coming to fast so they gave me an episiotomy,  I then realize her head is out they let me reach down and feel and then I have to push and get her out the rest of the way. There is more commotion and I am asked to push more and more cause she apparently has something wrong  with her and they want her out now!


So she is here and Dr Walter is the doc that is delivering her, I am looking at Buddy and I realize they didn't allow him to cut her umbilical cord and I keep asking him is everything ok and trying to see Emma but he is telling me to just look at him and not to worry bout them over there she is fine.


The Dr. is sewing me up and explains what has happened.While emma was on her way out her umbilical cord wrapped around her neck hanging up when her head got out due to the cord being around her neck it tightened up and was now choking her.


They cut the Umbilical cord, while she was stuck and then started pulling her to get her shoulders unhung and then they got her out and took her to get her help. She was ok she was just in shock from all that had happened durring the labor. I know that this labor and delivery was harder on me than Kailey and I was very upset about what happened for Emma and for me.




We got to stay until today 11/22/2011.
So below is my daughter Emma sophia born on November 20 2011 at 3:33 am. I am thankful for all that I have been given and especially this little angel

Another day and no EMMA

I am wondering if Emma will show up on her own or will she be just as stubborn as Kailey. I hope she comes on her own, and not during thanksgiving. I honestly don't want her to be born on thanksgiving.

The reason I want her to come on her own is because I haven't experienced that. With Kailey we got induced and everything went according to plan with some minor stuff like "you may have to get a C-section because she wont come down." Emma is down.. she is head down, she is in the pit of my stomach she is ready to come out but she hasn't shown up yet!

I want my water to break I just want things to go as planned but at the same time I want things to go normally to I don't know if that is too much to ask or not. I am hoping not lol.

I hope that I can get some good time off with her. I get to go see the OBGYN tomorrow. Hopefully I am dilated past four and things are good. I was 4 last thursday, but over the weekend of course I went to Cincinnati and walked a bunch and then now I am back at work, working a bunch nothing has induced labor I want them to induce it so I don't have to wait patiently for water to break. lol

It has been almost a month

So it has been almost a month. Buddy and I just got back from Cincinnati, we went to see West Virginia Play UC. West Virginia Whooped some ass. The next day we went to see Steelers Play against the Bengals. It was a good game but not near as good as WVA VS UC.

We walked near the River, went to some bars (yes I am 9 months pregnant and due to have a baby Nov 25th) I didn't drink just hung out and socialized. We had a great time. It was a 4 hour ride to Covington KY and then we parked at the hooters took a shuttle boat across the river to Cincinnati and walked to the stadium. I enjoyed every moment of it.

It felt good to have a kid free weekend, it would have been nice if I could have drank. I wish we could do more stuff like that together without the kids. I don't know if that will ever happen or not. I am just hoping that when Emma gets here sometimes in the next 10 days she is a happy healthy baby, no colic, nothing to bad going on with her. I am hoping I can breast feed and everything goes according to plan.


I am hoping that Christmas goes well and I will still get to see my friends and work family and I wont have any postpartum depression. I did with Kailey and I am so hoping that I wont with Emma. For all those who read my blog pray for these things to go as planned. Also Pray that Thanksgiving is not ruined for Kailey who says we can not-not celebrate thanks giving. She is gonna be bummed out if thanksgiving is affected by Emma's arrival.

I love Emma already and she isn't even here I can't wait to see her little face and hold her for the first time. I know we wanted a boy but no matter what you get you love it just the same. Buddy hasn't had that epiphany yet, he thinks that he will never be able to love another child as much as he loves Kailey... but I know once he see's Emma it will be just like the day we had Kailey.